From the home office at tjthesportsgeek.com in beautiful downtown Orangevale,Calif.

Top Eight Things to Do While Stuck in Traffic

8. Turn on hazard lights, see who stops to see if you’re okay

7. Use jumper cables to give roadkill a second jolt of life

6. Imagine you’re in a line of cars waiting to run over Kanye West

5. Walk up to guy in car in front of you,ask if he has found Jesus Christ

4. Roll down window, ask car next to you “Is this the line for enchiladas?”

3. Smoke something

2. Listen to rap song, count how many times the words “bitch” and “ho” appear in song

1. Complain about the beating United Airlines gave you last weekend