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The Things That Need to Go in 2015, Part Four


We are at the fourth part of the list. This is the list of The Things That Need to Go in 2015. Here are Nos. 40-21. As a disclaimer, this list should be taken lightly and is for entertainment purposes only. Also,there are images in this part that may be graphic and not for children’s eyes, viewer discretion is advised.

angels40. The name “Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim”

First year selection

Ever since the Angels changed their name to the current one in 2005,I have hated it. You’re either the Los Angeles Angels or the Anaheim Angels. You can’t be both!
I have a better idea,how about going back to the best name you’ve ever had,the California Angels? I know they’re a Southern California team,but it did fit them well in the 30 years they had it. My second choice is the Anaheim Angels because they won their lone World Series under that name. This current name is just awful!
byefelicia39. The phrase “Bye Felicia!”

First year selection

Here’s a catchphrase that’s become too popular and is bugging me to death: “Bye Felicia!”.

It comes from the movie Friday,which is a great movie even though it’s 20 years old. It’s being used too much by rich,arrogant white girls who don’t even know the origin of the phrase whatsoever and have probably never even seen the movie.
And by the way,way to be relevant to today with this catchphrase. You couldn’t pick a more recent movie? Wow!

dominantconvos38. People who dominate the conversation

First year selection

This has bugged me for a really long time and it’s not fun being in conversations with these people. You know the ones, the ones that have to talk through the whole conversation and not let you speak a word. These are the kind of people I hate talking to the most because I don’t get a chance to or really have anything to add to the conversation.

True story: I was talking to one of these people and while they were talking my ear off I texted someone else because they had something more interesting to say and I was more interested in that conversation than the face-to-face I was having.

Being a good listener is one thing,but being nothing but the listener just sucks.

Sluts37. People who think acting like slut is also known as “growing up”

Second year selection: 2014:35

I hardly think that acting like a slut makes you a grown-up. I never have. Immaturity in a girl is something that is a big-time turn off to me as I have mentioned before in the list. If you’re 29 and acting so slutty your stretchmarks are showing, chances are I’m not interested. Clearly there’s still some growing up to do with you.

Making good choices in life and being good to yourself and everything around you is what makes you mature and grown-up. Not being slutty.

JBieber36. Justin Bieber

Second year selection: 2014:24

Here’s a kid who’s been nothing but a punk the last two years. With all the legal trouble he’s been in with the egging of a neighbor’s house to the DUI to whatever else he’s done to warrant rehab, it’s easy to see why Bieber has made the list two times in a row.

He’s become the new Aaron Carter/ R. Kelly in my view and if he isn’t careful his career may erode as fast as theirs did.
KeepCalm35. All Keep Calm posters

Second year selection: 2014:68

I thought we’d be done with these by now,but I guess we’re not. How are Keep Calm posters still so popular three years later? I thought for sure this fad would have died by now and unfortunately it still lives. That’s why it moved so far up the list from last year.

I don’t want to keep calm,don’t tell me to do it. I’ll do so when I am ready. Got it? Okay,good,let’s move on!
CopenhagenZoo34. The Copenhagen Zoo

First year selection

Here is another Keepin’ it Real entry and the god awful Copenhagen Zoo. This is the zoo that slaughtered a perfectly good giraffe because they were afraid of inbreeding for some reason. Not only did they euthanize it,but did so in front of children and then fed it to the lion pen.

They then killed four baby lion cubs to make way for a new male lion who they feared would kill them. I just don’t understand their methods of doing things nor do I think they are in any way humane. They could’ve given that giraffe to another zoo (and there were zoos who offered to take it off their hands), but they chose the stupid way out of that one. What an awful zoo!

bluelightsoncars33. CATCH-ALL: Excessive blue lighting on cars and Spinners on wheels

First year selections

Why do people insist putting blue lighting on their crappy ’98 Hyundais? It’s like your grandmother getting a boob job! I saw this same car countless times in a parking lot near my house with this blue lighting underneath the car and it looked pretty tacky. I don’t know why anyone would do this really,it doesn’t increase the value of your high mileage Japanese car. Ever.
And also,why are spinners still around? Is it 2004? Do people really need to see your hubcaps spin at a red light? I think it’s time we retire these,kids!

San Francisco 49ers v Arizona Cardinals32. CATCH-ALL: Obnoxious NFL fans and People who set off fireworks after their team scores a touchdown

First year selections

So many teams have so many obnoxious fans. You know the ones,the fans that get in your face when obnoxiously cheering for their team, the ones that throw rocks at you in the parking lot, the ones that give you shit at the mall for wearing your team’s gear.

These are the kind of fans I tend to keep away from because it’s just a game. If all you have to look forward to is Sunday during the fall, you need more to look forward to.

As for lighting fireworks off after your team scores,is that reallly necessary? This happened in my neighborhood during the playoffs last season and I just said out loud “Really?”. There are many appropriate ways to celebrate your team scoring,fireworks after an extra point is not one of them.

BabyHashtag31. People who name their kids Hashtag

First year selection

Why would anyone name their kids this? Whatever happened to traditional names?

It seems nowadays that parents will find any way to make any word a name for their child, but seriously,Hashtag? That makes people who name their children after cable channels look borderline sane.

All of these kids who are named Hashtag will be made fun of time and time again when they get older,I guarantee it. Yikes,that’s an awful name!

stouffers-lasagna30. Funerals that don’t feature lasagna

First year selection

You’re probably wondering why this made the list. Well,I will tell you,it’s because a funeral is not a funeral if there isn’t a tray of Stouffer’s lasagna being served at it. I don’t think I’ve ever been to a funeral that hasn’t had this in my nearly 33 years of life and I hope I never have to. Funerals need lasagna,period!

socksthatdontmatch29. People who mismatch socks on purpose

Third year selection: 2014:4,2013:28

Though I don’t see this as much as I did last year,it’s still a trend that has yet to die a full death. All of these girls who are under 18 who don’t wear matching socks. I don’t understand the appeal of this, I honestly think it’s just plain laziness in a society that continues to promote laziness.

It isn’t hard to match your socks,if I can do it,so can you! If this trend doesn’t die, I am almost expecting people to mismatch their shoes. If this happens,just remember who called it!

OpenOnThanksgiving28. Stores being open on Thanksgiving

First year selection

Here is another Keepin’ it Real item. There has been a trend of stores opening before Black Friday which means keeping people from being with their families on Thanksgiving.

Having worked retail for seven and a half years prior to my current job, I worked Thanksgiving one time and I hated it and in years after that I weaseled out of it,something that I am still proud of. I didn’t think it was okay for us to be open nor did I see any point in me doing so whatsoever. Besides that, stores aren’t makking very much more money by being open,so why even do it?

Hopefully more retailers take the lead of Costco and others who took a pass on being open and rewarding their hard working employees by giving them the day off to spend with their loved ones. You know,how Thanksgiving should be.

27. Hanes commercials featuring talking tags

First year selection

I jotted this down at the beginning of the year and I’m kinda glad it stood the test of the year. That stupid Hanes commercial where someone’s tag on a T-Shirt is talking during a movie and then it drowns in a soda when Michael Jordan removes it from the dude’s shirt.

It seems to me that Hanes can think of a better ad campaign then that one. I agree that tags on T-shirts are annoying as hell,but we don’t need a bad commercial to highlight that fact. We’re smarter than that!

AdultOnesies26. Adult onesies

Second year selection: 2014: 43

Some things should not be made for adults and onesies should be one of them.

I found it hard to believe these existed when I first saw them and as time goes on, I still think they’re a bad idea. In an effort to act your age, I implore everyone who is over the age of five to never buy or wear these.Ever. Time to grow up and take off the training wheels and the onesies while we’re at it!

Obamathumbsup25. CATCH-ALL: People who compare Obama to Hitler, People who think President Obama is at fault for what happened with Hurricane Katrina, People who are suing the President, and People who want Obama deported

First year selections

I get that people aren’t the biggest supporters of the President and that he hasn’t done the greatest job a President has ever done,but to ask for his deportation, sue him, compare him to Hitler,or to somehow pin Hurricane Katrina on him is donwright insane. It screams of too much desperation to want a President gone who doesn’t really need to be.

Look,2016 is coming and you get the chance to select another President who can’t make any positive change because Congress won’t allow it. I’m sure you can hang until then,so chill out. Go take a selfie with a bear or something!

SlippersInPublic24. People who wear slippers in public

First year selection

I have seen a huge growth in this where people (mainly females) think it’s okay to pass their slippers off as regular shoes. They’re far from it.

There’s a reason why a nickname for slippers is “house shoes”, because they’re supposed to be worn at home, nowhere else. I’m pretty certain that locating a pair of shoes before you leave the house is an easy task. It’s time to perform it!

SelfCheckout23. Self-checkout

Second year selection: 2014:11

While there are some pluses of going through a self-checkout line like getting through quicker when you have few items, but overall, these machines do more bad than good.

First off,they’re so temperamental. Anytime you remove an item too quickly,the machine gets offended and shit. Also, there are certain things you can’t buy at the self-checkout like alcohol and/or tobacco. Second,they’ve taken the jobs of checkers away. With the amount of self-checkout terminals you have, five jobs could be there instead. Some people need just one job and if we get rid of self-checkout,they just might have it even though it’s in the grocery business.

UsernamePassword22. “Your username and/or password is incorrect,please try again”

Second year selection: 2014:36

This made the list last year and again this year. It always bugs me when either my password or username is incorrect and the site I’m at won’t tell me which one it is. Is it that hard to disclose this information to me? How can I take care of the problem if I don’t know what it is? It can’t be that hard to tell me if it’s the password or the username. Maybe it’s just me,but we have too many passwords and usernames as it is.

PoliceLights21. Police sirens in music

First year selection

This is one thing that scares the hell out of me when I am driving. I’ll be hearing a song and then all of a sudden there are sirens in the song that I think are the police. It makes me want to pull over because I was going too fast and then I look behind me and there’s no cop behind me. If all hip-hop artists and rappers would stop inserting sirens in their songs,that would be great!

Part Five comes your way tomorrow!


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December 2014
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