Part One was yesterday,now we have Part Two for you with The Things That Need to Go in 2013, here’s No. 80…
80. People who are addicted to Disneyland
There’s a big reason why this is on the list, it’s plain and simple. Nobody needs to go to Disneyland seven times per year. Really?
First of all, how are you affording all of this? Isn’t Disneyland expensive? How in this economy can someone even afford to go once let alone seven times?
Second of all, why have I not been invited? I haven’t been there since 1992. Don’t you think I’d like to go,too?
Here’s what I am gonna do, I’m gonna go and only go with people who have only gone once or not at all. I can’t go with people who have been there too much because they’ll ruin the experience by telling us where the cool shit is. I want to find it for myself,yo!
79. Ghostriding in your car
2012: 67
This has slipped slightly from last year’s list and it’s actually something I don’t see as much,but I do hear about it and it’s still terrible.
This is a fine example of why not everyone should be able to have drivers licenses. Why do you do it? Do you think you’re that cool? You’re not. You’re actually a threat to other people’s safety and also not fit to drive a car. If I see this again in the next year, it will be back on the list because people who do this suck.
78. Cee Lo Green
I’m really not the biggest fan of this guy and it’s not because of his overplayed song on the radio, it’s because he’s part of the NFL Network Thursday Night Football intro before the game starts.
He’s the network’s version of Faith Hill.
I wanted to rank this higher on the list,but I think his 15 minutes of fame are drying up soon enough.
77. Photobombing
In my day, the way people acted like total douchebags in photographs was to put bunny ears on someone behind their backs. Now, people have taken the “Look at me” attitude to a new level by photobombing.
Yeah, that’s a great idea, let’s ruin someone else’s perfectly fine photograph by making an unnecessary cameo appearance in it. If you want to be in a photo with someone, ask them. Don’t fuck up theirs!
76. People who forget where they came from
I’ve known a lot of people who were/are like this and I lose a lot of respect for those people. And this item can be stretched into different ways,whether it be somebody changing sports teams when they move into a new city (a big no-no in my eyes) or just forgetting about friends they used to know. It always begs the question I have of “What happened to you? You used to be cool!” . Nobody likes to be forgotten and those who do forget you generally miss out themselves and that’s pretty sad.
75. Indian summer
We’ve been having way too many late summers here locally where in months like October where it gets in the 90s and even November it gets to be in the 80s and irritates me to no end.
If you’ve read this blog long enough, you’ll know that this time of year is my favorite because of how cold it gets. It does not need to be hot during the fall. Around October is when I really start to yearn for colder weather and mother Nature should oblige with the times. Don’t prolong it!
74. CATCH-ALL: VH1 and All E! Shows not named The Soup
VH1 has not been watchable in a long time. Ever since Best Week Ever went off the air I have no reason to watch it. I tried watching Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew but it got to be too hard to watch and next to none of the celebrities ever got better. Yes, I know Pop-Up Video is back but I can never find when it’s on.
As for E!, it is also a terrible network with nothing but shows about the terrible Kardashians. The Soup is the only good show on that network and it’s not on enough in the time I’m awake for me to see it.
Both of these channels just suck and they’ve lost their luster of what they used to be. Just end it now!
73. Post-Potter Depression
2012: 60
I can’t believe people are still this depressed about the Harry Potter series is over. It’s almost as bad as the people who aren’t over Mitt Romney not getting elected as President (which we will cover later).
There are worse things to be sad about in life: Being fired from your job, breaking up with somebody you really love,and settling on watching something because nothing else is on all qualify. The end of a book series is nothing to be sad about.
If I can get over Seinfeld ending, you can get past this. Just sayin…
72. People who still do the Macarena
2012: 16, 2011: 24
This slipped hugely this year because the new Macarena is now Gangnam Style and people are doing that to death now. But from time to time, the Macarena will rear its ugly head and it is still my least favorite song.
It’s also an inappropriate song to play,too in case anyone involved with masonic youth is reading this. It’s about a slut who sleeps with two other guys while her boyfriend is out of town. Such an educational song,isn’t it?
The dance is horrible,too. It looks like your trying to make love to yourself. Also, seeing the elderly dancing to a song about a whore seems wrong to me.
By the way, this may never make the list again if I don’t see it happen next year. Gangnam style might because I’m getting sick of it pretty fast.
71. CATCH-ALL: Kristen Stewart and Movies about daytime vampires
Kristen Stewart would be more attractive and likable if she wasn’t so creepy and also didn’t dress like she was homeless. Really? You’re wearing a pair of dingy Vans slip-ons with a dress? Are we still 10 years old?
How does someone who makes $22 million a year not know how to dress?If I made that much money annually I would make damn sure someone was with me to make sure I dressed like I should.
Also, it’s still pretty unrealistic to me about vampires in the daytime. That’s like a television series about people getting lost on a deserted island following a plane crash in the 21st century, a time in which people have something called GPS.
70. Anyone whose last name is Lohan
I’m getting sick of this family as much as I am the Kardashians and the Palins (who we will get to later).
Lindsay is a washed-up has been whose best days are behind her. There is no way in hell she’s getting a second chance in Hollywood because she isn’t committed enough to making a difference in her own life for the better. Also, she has a terrible family. Her mother is a drunk (as seen on Dr. Phil) who rides her daughter’s coat tails in order to be famous herself and her father is also a scumbag.
This shouldn’t even be on the list but it is because I’m sure we haven’t seen the last of Lindsay or her awful family.
69. People who think smoking hookah is “safe” and cool
2012: 61
I used to smoke a long time ago and I did smoke hookah. Years later I wonder why I ever did. This stuff is so unhealthy for you it makes cigarettes and cigars seem tame. And for those of you who claim it’s “safer”, you’re dead wrong, in fact it’s more harmful for you than anything else you can smoke.
You can add flavor to anything, it doesn’t mean it’s always the better alternative. Would you add a sugar flavoring to urine? Of course not! Drinking urine is gross and something you wouldn’t do even if you’re life depended on it. So why smoke honey flavored tobacco?
I’m not part of the anti-smoking campaign, I just wonder why some people do such things.
68. The real life Wendy’s red head
This new campaign for Wendy’s makes me miss Dave Thomas more and more. Nobody is this enthusiastic about going to Wendy’s ever. I like Wendy’s very much, in fact,it was my first job when I was 18 and I was there for seven months, but the commercials are just too much.
Not only that, but every time I see a red-headed lady who looks like her, I get the craving to go to Wendy’s. It’s pretty frightening how that happens.
67. CATCH-ALL:People who say they’re going to delete their Facebook and don’t and People who post random crap on Facebook just to get attention
I love it when people say they are going to delete their Facebook because nine times out of 10 they either don’t or they do for a couple days, realize their lives suck without it, and bring it back. If you’re going to do something,be one whose word is true. Get the job done,pal!
As for you punks who post stuff on Facebook for attention, you should probably get out more.
66. Micro-managing
Everyone likes an efficient workplace, but when it comes at a price of you not being able to work in the best way you know how, chances are it’s going to backfire. I know from experience because all micro-managing does is bring down morale, makes people unhappy with their jobs, and service to the public and the company itself suffers big time. If you leave people along so they can do their jobs, the happier they will be and the more efficient the workplace is.
Not everyone operates the same way, if we did,we would be robots and people who are robots are boring.
65. People who rap their order at the drive-thru
This is mainly white people who do this while trying to be cute and it’s so not that. It’s stupid and just another form of douchebaggery. Nobody on the other side of the drive-thru speaker thinks your rap about how you want three Big Mac combo meals is creative or even funny. Quite frankly, you’re wasting your time and breath.
Not long ago, a couple of people were arrested for doing this. While the police were probably out of line for doing that, it was pretty funny to hear about.
64. Wearing pajamas at school or work
2011: 12
For the life of me I don’t know why this didn’t make last year’s list,but it’s back for 2013. I hate this because it promotes laziness. There is no reason why you should be in college at 630 in the morning in pajamas. It’s also a safe bet that they didn’t shower before coming to school and that,too is also gross.
The only time going out in pajamas is acceptable is if you suddenly need something from the store or wherever and it’s past 10pm. That’s it. You cannot be in pajamas at school or work. Oh,and pajama days at school are also unacceptable. This is teaching our children that it’s okay to be lazy.
63. Facebook hacking
I have always found the practice of this to be pretty stupid. I hate it because when someone does this,they lack the respect of other people’s privacy,and lord knows we only have so much of that these days. This hasn’t really happened to me because I’m careful with my electronic devices and not dumb enough to fall for it. And it never will,by the way.
62. The practice of interviewing or talking to empty chairs
This just had to make the list and the summary will tell you why:
This happened a couple of times this past year. The first time it happened was when MSNBC host Lawrence O’Donnell had a guest cancel on him. That guest was Craig Sonner, the lawyer of George Zimmerman, the man who killed Trayvon Martin. Sonner for some reason decided to bail on the interview despite making the rounds on other shows on other networks. The Last Word host decided to make a fool of himself and his network by not letting the issue go and interviewed Sonner’s empty chair.
The second instance was more famous. It featured legendary actor Clint Eastwood interviewing an empty chair on stage at the Republican National Convention. Eastwood was talking to the chair as if President Obama was in it. Eastwood’s attempt to be funny fell flat and the incident was parodied on other news networks and talk shows.
Let’s knock this off. If you can’t get a guest or the President to sit in the chair, don’t bother.
61. Glee
2012: 21, 2011:11
This has slipped big time on the list because the show is getting worse. Fans of the show have told me it’s jumped the shark and continues to.
I don’t and have never watched it because I wasn’t popular in high school nor was it the greatest four years of my life. If it was for you, this is your show. Also,I’m a straight man and very few of them watch shows like this.
We like shows with violence in it or we watch sports. Plus,this show was better when it was called Fame. Just to let you know…
We will have Part Three (Nos. 60-41) tomorrow!