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The Things That Need to Go in 2020, Part Three

Things20

Hello Everyone and welcome back to our countdown of The Things That Need to Go in 2020. Part Two included items such as tiny paper clips, dad sneakers, and the mic drop. Now we move on to part three of our list, numbers 60-41. These are the things,trends,words,and other stuff that need to go when the new year comes.

Disclaimer: This list is for entertainment purposes only and should only be taken semi-seriously.

On with the list and number 60!

MadBumHR60. The idea of the DH in the NL

Second year selection

Something I continue to hear about that I never want to see happen ever in my lifetime is the designated hitter in the National League. The chatter about it increases every offseason and thus far the baseball gods haven’t implemented it.

The American League has had it since 1973 and when visiting an NL park have had their pitcher it (as in the way baseball is supposed to be played). So far, the National League hasn’t followed suit despite the feeling of inevitability that it will.

Can pitchers rake? Sometimes. Look at Madison Bumgarner and Jake Arrieta, they’ve come up with some monster home runs in their time. The problem is that you only see those guys every five days or so. I know that with the power surge that baseball is seeing that it may happen for the National League. I just hope it’s not anytime soon. Pitchers should hit, end of story!

Richsplaining59. Richsplaining

Second year selection

This is back on the list after a year’s absence and for good reason: it’s still happening.

I absolutely loathe it when someone who has never had to struggle a day in their life is all of a sudden an expert on how not to struggle or get out of poverty.

It’s not only patronizing, it’s also unwanted advice from people who have never been there before and is unable to sympathize on what it’s like to be in that situation. Those people need to go away and go play some golf or tennis or whatever it is these people do when they’re telling us how worthless we are in the most condescending of ways.

AssignedSeatingWeddings58. Assigned table seating at weddings

Second year selection

This has made my list again because of how often I’m at a wedding and get assigned to a table where I don’t know anybody. Well, not anybody, maybe a few people I know kinda okay, but for the most part, it’s strangers.

Don’t get me wrong, if I was assigned to a table where I knew mostly everyone, then this doesn’t make the list. But since it almost always never happens with my luck and as a result, my anxiety ramps up and I get scared to open up to anyone, and that’s not something I want to deal with on a joyous occasion such as this.

 

TomiLahren57. Tomi Lahren

Fourth year selection

With being put in Facebook jail twice for tweets I sent to Miss Lahren you would think this would have stayed in the lower part of the list. It hasn’t because she hasn’t been as relevant as she was in years past.

Don’t get me wrong, I still can’t stand this woman and everything she stands for, but it gives me peace of mind that many others feel the same way I do and aren’t buying what she’s selling. Also, she put out those dumb workout leggings that have a holster so you can bring your gun with you to yoga class. That’s an accident waiting to happen. Who is packing heat while doing a tree pose?

She’s such a joke and anyone who follows her and worships the ground she walks on is just about the same, too. She also hates black people, too.

NikesBurning56. Boycotts of outrage

Second year selection

While I don’t see as much of this as I did in the past, people and their “boycotts of outrage” are still pretty terrible and have made the list yet again.

From Nike shoes to Chick-fil-A, people everywhere have an axe to grind with whomever and are burning merchandise left and right despite the fact that these places already have your money.

We know that these places don’t honor your “values”, it’s just that we don’t care. You don’t see me whining about where I don’t go to (except for Papa John’s, but that’s because their pizza is gross and most everyone agrees with that!), you’re just doing it to be an attention whore. This is just like when people burn their jerseys and nobody cares about this,either.

Barbecue55. Neighbors who complain about barbecuing

Second year selection

This has made our list before and it’s back again because, for some reason, people complain about their neighbors having barbecues and having fun in life.

I don’t understand why that would bother anybody. Have you ever smelled barbecue? It smells amazing. In fact, I welcome it year round. If you want to throw on some ribs in February, be my guest!

I heard about some lady in Australia who whined about it, and not long after that, the entire block had another barbecue around her house. Why? Because barbecues are awesome. The only complaint about barbecues anyone should have is why there aren’t enough of them,that’s it!

MomJeans54. Mom jeans

First year selection

When the heck did high-waisted jeans from the 1980s that only older soccer moms wear become so popular?

I guess it’s better than seeing girls in saggy pants or even skinny jeans,but mom jeans? But why?

These things look straight out of a Whitesnake concert circa 1987 and I really don’t think they’re flattering. Some things should stay in the past and these jeans are among them. Stay tuned for more things in the list that should remain where they last were.

53. Weird dances for centrist presidential candidates

First year selection

This will probably be the first and only time this makes the list, but due to the goofiness of the dance that Pete Buttigieg’s white supporters cooked up for his campaign, it cracked the top 100 and lands in Part Three.

If you haven’t seen it, this horrible dance is choreographed in such a way that makes you cringe just by viewing it. The dance is set to Panic! At the Disco’s “High Hopes” and is guaranteed to net Buttigieg even less support among black voters than he already has now.

I’m not a Buttigieg fan in the slightest. I think if he’s the nominee, he will lose to Trump. But even if this dance was attributed to a campaign of someone I might vote for, I would still hate it. It’s campy, it’s too rehearsed for how awful it is, and makes me want to punch a hole in a wall everytime I see it.

Finna52. The word “finna”

First year selection

I absolutely despise this word and while I don’t know where it came from, I want it gone.

If you’re using this word to replace “gonna”, you’re wasting your time because the two words have the same exact number of letters, therefore making “finna” an unnecessary word to use to replace “gonna”. Plus, this feels like a word that unbearable Southerners use and you don’t have to subject yourself to such a thing only because it’s becoming popular.

Anyways, I’m gonna move on to other items now because there are bigger fish to fry in the kitchen and more beans to burn on the grill.

LAChargers.png51. The Chargers from Los Angeles

First year selection

I think most everyone can agree that the experiment of the Chargers in Los Angeles has been a disaster. They play in a 30,000 seat stadium that fans of the opposing team come to watch and if there’s a such thing as a fan base for this team, they’re very difficult to find.

I guess that’s what happens when you leave behind generations of fans in the city you once played in for 56 years. I guess that’s why the NFL is flirting with the awful idea to have them play in London full time.

No,no,no,NFL! Here’s what you do,and this advice,by the way,is free on me. You see if you can find an investment group who is willing to get this team back home to San Diego with the understanding that a new stadium gets built. The last thing I think anyone wants is to have this team play on another continent where players would have to get work visas and uproot their families half the year,not to mention realigning the divisions so that the Chargers are in the AFC East. That most likely means the Dolphins get moved to the AFC South and the Texans move to the AFC West. Doesn’t seem worth it to me to move one franchise to Europe when there are a number of cities who would gladly host an NFL team.

Do the right thing,NFL,and move them back home where they belong!

patrobertson50. Televangelists

Third year selection

Once again, the money-grubbing bible thumpers known for spreading the word of Jesus on television are back on our countdown.

Not only is their love and devotion of Jesus laughable, but it’s also not genuine. They’re only doing this because they love money and want you, their sheep followers, to funnel as much cash as possible to them so that you don’t die or whatever. Beyond that, they’ll stop at nothing to get you to give them your last dollar.

I also think that they give religion a bad name. Instead of spreading love, inclusion, and peace they make it okay for you to hate, being a group that won’t include you, and advocate for more wars and more right wing policies that harm us more than they help us.

These wiseacres with their megachurches and jets they bought with money from their followers after informing them that they will die if they don’t get them aren’t worthy of any love or attention, except or being on this list.

NametheTeam49. Name the team contests

Third year selection

These are not only awful, but they’re a waste of time.

Why? Because the team that you think you’re helping to name already has one that has yet to be revealed by the ownership group because they want to see if anyone else came up with it,too. If so, the owners give them like a free TV or something. The fans had nothing to do with the team name whatsoever.

This is just a fake campy way to make fans feel included in the process and it’s nowhere near genuine as you think. If it was, this wouldn’t make the list ever again. I think these phony contests are a waste of everyone’s time and honestly, the fans are going to hate the name anyways,so why bother?

MaxineWaters48. Congresspeople who don’t even live in their own districts

Second year selection

This is one that still bothers me because it still happens and it shouldn’t. Congresspeople that represent you but can’t be bothered to live there. There’s a number of them out there and locally where I am that’s no exception.

The district where I work is represented by Tom McClintock,a man who carpetbagged the district and oh,by the way,doesn’t live there. He lives in District 7 where I am, our congressman is Ami Bera. It should go without saying that you should probably be living in the very place you represent to understand the needs of the people living there. That can’t be done living somewhere else.

This is a big part of why politicians are way out of touch with the constituents they serve. I don’t think this should be allowed ( I always thought that it wasn’t) and I actually think you should have to vacate your office if you can’t live there. That would make heads roll and these do-nothing lawmakers might actually have to do their jobs for a change.

blindinglights47. Vehicles with bright ,blinding LED headlights

First year selection

I feel like this might have made the list before, but I could be wrong.

Anyways, I get so frustrated when people blind the hell out of me with their headlights that are so bright you can light a football stadium with,it’s ridiculous!

I get that sometimes people really do need bright headlights to see when they drive at night,and those folks I sympathize with. But the folks who do it just to be a prick are the ones I have beef with.

Maybe you’re the kind of person who shouldn’t be driving at night if your goal is to blind everyone who’s in front of you on the road. Just sayin’

leashkids46. Kids on leashes

Fifth year selection

One of our original items from the list in 2011 is now back for a fifth time. I continue to see this all time, especially when I go to Disneyland and it makes me sad.

Your toddler is not a doggie. Leashes are for doggies. The practice of using a leash not only treats them like animals, but I feel that a lot of trust issues will come up in the years to follow. I have a niece who will be four next year and her younger sister will be two soon and neither of them are hooked onto a leash. Why? Because their loving parents know well enough to hold their hands and vice versa. They know what’s up!

HQtrivia45. HQ Trivia’s glitches

Second year selection

I love playing HQ Trivia and even though I don’t play as much as I used to, it’s fun to hav a live trivia game show on your phone where you can compete to win prizes and pocket change. But the glitches the game gets seemingly always have to go.

How does something as big as HQ always break down like that? If the game is at 6pm my time, you gotta make sure that the game is good to go when we all show up to come play. I can’t hang on while you fix things.

I think that’s why some people stopped playing, but overall I love the game, I just don’t love the glitchiness of it. Make it stop! Also, show Reggie the Bear!

ChucksDisneylanf44. People who wear the wrong shoes to Disneyland

Second year selection

Having been an annual pass holder to Disneyland for five years now, I know what to expect when I make my semi-annual treks to the Happiest Place on Earth. This includes wearing comfortable shoes.

Ladies, as much as I love you in heels, I don’t think you need to be in them on Space Mountain or anywhere in the park. Do you really want to spend the day in pain? I didn’t think so! The only exceptions are if you’re there on like a date night and wear them like a boss, by all means,go for it!

Also, let’s leave the Converse All-Stars either at home or back at the hotel. Those are not the best shoes to wear there. I made that mistake in 2014 and paid for it for weeks. Not only,but anytime I see someone in them at the park , they either smash the backs of them to walk around easier in or take them off completely as they’re resting or are carrying them out upon leaving the park. As with heels, if you can withstand the pain,go for it. Otherwise, get yourself some decent walking or running shoes to trek through the park during your time there. You’re welcome!

Debates43. Debates with stupid people

First year selection

This had to make the list this year because unfortunately I found myself in too many of these and honestly, I don’t need to do that anymore.

A few months ago, I found myself in debates with people who aren’t as well read as me and what I found was that their comebacks at me were bad and they even resorted to name calling when they couldn’t come up with a good comeback to my awesome knowledge. That’s usually a sign that they don’t have anything to come back with and have given up.

I’ve come to realize that any debate with them is a waste of time and that there’s no changing their minds. If anything they have to try and wise up on their own. Once they do, they’ll realize you were right all along and wish they had figured that out a lot sooner than they did.

Chunky Peanut Butter42. Chunky peanut butter

First year selection

Some people may not like that this is on the list, but I don’t care! Chunky peanut butter is downright disgusting.

I love peanut butter, but I don’t want it as a full meal like some of you do. Chunky and crunchy peanut butter have absolutely no place in society. It’s just as bad as Miracle Whip,and don’t even get me started on that because it didn’t make the list.

There’s only one kind of peanut butter and it’s called creamy. It spreads well unlike chunky or crunchy peanut butter. If you’ve successfully spread chunky or crunchy peanut butter, you’re lying to me. Nobody can spread that stuff. That would be like understanding what Kanye West is up to now or trying to figure out why people like Mike Pence. It’s impossible!

It’s creamy peanut butter or go home!

marleauthornton.jpg41. The San Jose Sharks signing old fogeys

First year selection

The San Jose Sharks have been a model for consistency for a number of years, despite not winning a Stanley Cup yet. However, they have a knack for holding themselves back by not going with a younger roster and instead signing and re-signing guys who are beyond past their prime and should be in NHL retirement homes. Joe Thornton was re-signed at the age of 40 despite the fact that his best days are behind him and that his beard is terrible-looking. Also re-signed was Patrick Marleau, 40, who couldn’t help the Maple Leafs get over the top and had 29 other teams pass on signing him before he ended up back on the Sharks.

Instead of these old fogeys, the Sharks need to get younger on their roster and could use a player who is like their own Sidney Crosby or Connor McDavid. They need a guy who is fast and can change a game just by being on the ice. I don’t see a guy like that on their current roster and until they have that player they won’t be hoisting Lord Stanley’s Cup anytime soon.

We’ll have part four, numbers 40-21, for you tomorrow!

2 replies »

  1. #42—One thing to say—Are you NUTS!?! (See what I did there? Heh-heh) Crunchy Peanut Butter is the only choice! I’ll join Chef Alex Guarnaschelli and join her “Team Texture “ any day! I also enjoy seeds in my jams, too! Good luck finding that today what with “people like you” who would prefer to gum your PB/J sandwiches!
    So what if it’s hard to spread?? I STIR my peanut butter first to get that spreadability!
    Smooth peanut butter is for old people with no teeth or persons with no taste!!

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