The Things That Need to Go in 2018,Part Three

Things18

Hello Everyone,

We’ve gone through 40 items on the list and after today we’re halfway done. In the first part we went over the co-worker who microwaves fish in the breakroom and flip-flop socks and in the second part we covered things such as unfunny conservatives,smash cakes for adults and vaping. We’re now at Part Three and we’ll count down Nos. 80-61.

Disclaimer: This list is is intended for entertainment purposes and should be taken semi-seriously.

Here’s #80:

HowardDean80. Howard Dean

First year selection

This actually pains me to put this guy on our list because I once supported him and wanted him to be our President in 2004. Had he not gone crazy after losing the Iowa caucus that year,he might’ve had a shot at beating George W. Bush. Back then he was a great progressive guy who was going to get things done. Thirteen years later,he really changed and is not the guy he once was.

Since he was a Presidential candidate,he’s become more of a corporatist. He works as a lobbyist now siding against everything he once was. He’s part of the problem as to why the Democratic Party sucks and has lost 1000 seats nationwide dating back to when Obama was President. He looks down upon progressives who want to see this country get better and doesn’t think we need any change. He’s wrong a million times over.

I hope he sees that a revolution is coming. Since he’s not on board and keeps wanting to trot out corporate Democrats who take money from lobbyists and corporations and don’t listen to the people,he’s going to need to step aside.

ProBowl1779. The Pro Bowl

Third year selection

Ah yes,everyone’s least favorite All-Star Game is back on our list.

First of all,nobody watches it and nobody wants to play in it and it’s played during the off-week before the Super Bowl now in Orlando,not Hawaii.

Not only that,but it’s not a game where any real tackling is going on or anything of excitement for that matter. It’s just a bunch of borderline alternates who aren’t playing in the Super Bowl playing a game that doesn’t count in the standings.

Being named All-Pro should just be an honor now and that’s it. There’s no saving this game and no reason to play it.

HoodScoopsShiftKnobs78. CATCH-ALL: Fake hood scoops on cars and vanity shift knobs

First year selections

These two items made the list this year and they were early on the brainstorming list.

I think these two items are stupid because they look like something straight out of the 48

Fast and the Furious sequels we’ve had since 2011 and the last time I checked,the doofuses who have these fake hood scoops and vanity shift knobs that looks like guns weren’t cast in these movies.

They make your car look really tacky and I’m willing to bet that your ’98 Honda Civic hasn’t gone up in value all that much since adding those items onto it. It’s still a Civic,you moron,now matter how much fake stuff you put onto it.

FirstFour77. Play-in games for the NCAA tournament

First year selection

I’m actually surprised that I haven’t place this on the list before,but I think it needs to be added. The field of 64 was perfect the way it was before these play-in games were added many years back. I know that Virginia Commonwealth was one of those teams that made it to the Final Four as a first four team,but for the most part,these are usually teams who were 12-18 and happened to win their conference tournament which netted them an automatic bid or some team with a 16-14 record that will more than likely lose to Duke in the first round of 64.

I propose either going back to having 64 teams or expand it to 72 or something. I’m okay with more teams in the field,just not a weird number like 68.

PoliticalDynasties.jpg76. American political dynasties and monarchies

First year selection

I think part of the reason why we don’t have decent politicians representing us anymore is because of the family dynasties we have had.

Who else is sick and tired of having to vote for someone from the Clinton family or the Bush family or the Kennedy family? I know I am. Now the Obamas are threatening to be the next dynasty as whispers of former first lady Michelle Obama maybe making a run at the presidency in 2020. I don’t have anything against the Obamas per se, but her husband should’ve been a much better president. I was left disappointed over what wasn’t done in his eight years and how much longer we have to go in order to achieve that.

Anyways, we need someone with a different last name to be in office. Just because you have a famous last name or there’s a D or an R next to it doesn’t mean you’re any good.

AntiVaxxer75. Anti-vaxxers

Third year selection

These folks are as out there as they were a couple of years ago,but damnit,it has to stop.

As I have stated in the past,I’m not one who wants to tell other parents how to raise their kids because I have none,but honestly I don’t see the harm in being vaccinated. Myself and my three siblings were and we turned out fine. My niece has and she’s amazing.

Also,stop it with the claims that vaccines cause autism. There’s been absolutely no proof and you’re not a doctor,nor do you play one on television. It’s time to stop fearing what you don’t really know.

NancyPelosi74. Nancy Pelosi

First year selection

Attention my liberal friends, it’s time for this woman to go. Nancy Pelosi sucks! She has never passed any meaningful landmark legislation and honestly,she’s holding your party back.

This is the same woman who can’t name who the leader of her own party is or thinks that they don’t need a new direction despite the fact that they’ve lost over 1000 seats since the beginning of Obama’s second term. It’s partly because of Pelosi that a progressive agenda is shied away from, that the base of the party has been abandoned,and that the party is going to continue to lose the further to the right they keep going.

Also,she’s old and needs to retire. Part of the problem with this party is how many fogeys are in office. If they want the younger generation to have any sort of voice or even a future with the party, they’re going to have to step aside. Anyone who thinks that Pelosi isn’t part of the problem is delusional and needs to look at what a real progressive is.

Spoiler alert: It ain’t her!

BeachBallsStands73. Fans with beach balls in the stands

Second year selection

This made the list five years ago and it had to make the list again,partly because of the majority of fans that do this happen to be in Los Angeles and they happen to be at Dodger Stadium.

There are many annoying things that sports fans do at a game and this is one of them. You paid a lot of money to go to a sporting event and all you can do is play with a beach ball? What the hell’s wrong with you?

Beach balls belong at the beach,not in the stands along the third base side. Leave that shit at home!

BrittMcHenry.jpg72. Britt McHenry

First year selection

I had to place this person on the list because of how awful she is.

If you don’t know who she is,she was a sideline reporter for ESPN for many years until she was let go this year along with everyone else who works there. But before she was let go, she got caught on camera berating an employee from a tow yard and trying to play the “Don’t You Know Who I am?” card with her. She was suspended for the incident,but should’ve been fired.

Now she’s trying to reinvent herself as a Tomi Lahren-like conservative pundit and it’s kind of silly and sad to see. Britt, Fox News isn’t hiring you anytime soon,they already have Tomi Lahren (more on her later) and don’t need you period. Maybe you should try The Blaze or do some videos in your white privilege-mobile. I’m just throwing out ideas!

CarRadio.jpg71. Radio stations who thank you for “making the switch”

First year selection

I have never understood why local radio stations always thank you for “making the switch” to their station.

Why? Because the station I was listening to was playing the same songs over and over again? Aren’t you guys doing the same shit? And by the way,the moment you play a song I’ve heard many other times before,I’ll be “making the switch” to another station.

It’s almost 2018, I doubt that many of us really have a set favorite radio station anymore,especially with more options like satellite radio and places like Pandora and Spotify where we can personalize our preferences.

One more thing, you have to stop calling your stations “The New” for four years straight after you’ve yet again changed formats. You’re not new anymore!

FakeNews.jpg70. Calling news that you disagree with “fake news”

First year selection

While,yes,there is a lot of bad journalism out there and a lot of lies being reported, there are,in my view,more journalists who do work hard to get a story right.

Thanks to the idiot pretending to be President, it seems as though real news that they don’t agree with is labeled as fake even though the reports are real and sources are legitimate.

When the freedom of the press in our country is threatened in the way that it is, it spells worry to me because with the way we’re headed the more and more discredited our media in this country is,the more we’re headed in the direction of state-run television,something that communist countries have.

We can’t let that happen,we need open and independent reporting and we need it today.

BillMaher69. Bill Maher

First year selection

I used to like this guy and his show up until he pretty much became a partisan hack and a lapdog for Hillary Clinton and became very dismissive of the progressive wing of the Democratic Party.

He’s one of those guys on the left who want everyone on the left who didn’t want Hillary to get over it and “unite with us”.

Uh,yeah,no. I don’t want to unite with a losing message and a party with no platform other than “We’re not Trump”. Maher used to have a lot more backbone and was a guy who challenged both sides to be better,left and right. But now we see him for what he really is, a guy who is playing for a team and if you’re not on it,then the hell with you.

New rule, Bill, get over Hillary not winning.

gooddaysacramento68. Good Day Sacramento

Second year selection

This has made our list again this year and it’s because this is news for people who are over the age of 30 and refuse to get real information from a news leader. Instead,they watch because the anchors are in their pajamas and are giving you information you probably don’t need.

Not only that,but there aren’t any really good journalists on the show. If they had people who could ask tough questions and get quality news coverage where it’s needed, then it would be a better program. Instead, it’s a six-hour show full of nonsense and fluff.
Also,they don’t have a helicopter. I like news stations with a helicopter because helicopters are cool!

NRAfashionshow67. NRA fashion shows

First year selection

If gun nuts couldn’t be any nuttier,now they and the National Rifle Association have regular fashion shows.

What the hell for? For the redneck who wants to look fashionable while packing heat?

This is just absolutely stupid. Nobody gives a shit what you look like when carrying a gun because you’re scared all of the time. This is just another way for rednecks to try and fit in with society and it’s not working.

You know who didn’t need a gun? MacGyver, you also know who didn’t need to be in a fashion show? MacGyver!

Be more like MacGyver!

KissingParkingLots66. Couples who mack on each other in parking lots

Second year selection

This made the list a couple of years ago because of me seeing it happen in a couple of places and it’s back again because of how much this kind of thing is basically taunting me over the fact that I’m not able to find somebody to love.

Look,I’m fine with you two being together and making each other happy,but do you have to mack on one another in the fucking parking lot where everyone can see you? It’s called a room,get one.

Maybe one day I’ll be the guy sucking face with someone right next to my Honda CR-V and this won’t be on the list anymore,but until that happens and if I see it again,it might be back.

Denver Broncos v San Francisco 49ers

65. The lack of shade at Levi’s Stadium

Second year selection

How is there still no shade at this fucking stadium?

Ever since the 49ers decided to call Santa Clara home their stadium has been criticized for being a virtual oven for fans watching a bad football team play bad football.
When you’ve had fans suffering from exhaustion from being in the heat during the beginning of the year and getting massive sunburns, it’s a problem and it’s going to make them stay away because of it. Why would any fan travel that much time to go to a game when the team is not good to watch them lose and end up having something bad physically happen to them?

There has to be a way for the stadium to have more shade and fans are still waiting for that solution. After all, this stadium did cost a billion dollars to build. Time to remedy this problem for the team once and for all and their suffering fans.

MediumCheddar64. Medium cheddar

Fourth year selection

I love cheese,everyone does! I love cheddar cheese, but what I don’t love is when the cheddar cheese in my taco isn’t sharp enough.

Medium cheddar just doesn’t do much for me to be honest with you, it packs little to no punch and leaves me with a weird aftertaste. Sharp cheddar,however,is as perfect as perfect gets. Even extra sharp cheddar is magnificent. But when it comes to medium, it’s just bland and leaves more to be desired.

Never eat something that leaves more to be desired. Eat sharp or extra sharp cheddar!

NFLinLondon63. The NFL in London

First year selection

These London games have to go, I’m sorry,but I’m not a fan of this.

I’m not a fan of teams giving up a home game every year to go play in another country to hype up support for a team one day over there. Not only that,but the games are on way too early, have those digitally painted end zones and often feature two bad teams. If they were featuring two really good teams these games would be more accepted, but since they put nothing but garbage teams over there to showcase,they’re nothing to write home about.

Maybe if you got the interest of the fans back home instead you’d be better off.

62. Rapping newscasters

First year selection

For years I’ve been on people for rapping their orders at the drive-thru (which is still stupid) and rightfully so, but when it comes to newscasters rapping on television,it makes your newscast look unprofessional and makes me want to take you less seriously.
It’s bad enough that journalists are getting a bit of a bad rap these days for doing their jobs accurately and with the ones rapping on the air makes them look bad. Also, their rhymes and lyrics aren’t very good. Maybe if they were good at rapping the news it wouldn’t be so bad,but since it isn’t, it’s gotta go!

StephCurryDadShoes61. People with weak shoe games

Second year selection

Finally in Part Three is an item we had last year and honestly,it had to return.

Like,for instance, if I one of the fellas wearing a nice dress shirt and slacks and he’s wearing dress sandals with them, that’s just all wrong and pretty weak. Go out to DSW and get some dress shoes,son!

Ladies, why are you leaving the heels at home when they go perfectly with that dress? And you know what? You know they do, you just can’t be bothered to wear them. Instead,you’re in flip flops and impressing no one.

Honestly, it’s time for you guys to step up your shoe game. Shoes matter,guys and so does your game!

Part Four tomorrow!

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