From the home office of T.J. the Sports Geek in downtown Orangevale,Calif.

Top 8 Ways to Make Television Better

8.More television shows that take place on freeway median strips

7.A show about the Maloofs entitled 2 Broke Owners

6.New American Idol judges Rick Astley and Lou Bega

5.A feature that lets you put silly mustaches and glasses on news anchors

4.Something to hook up to your dog to make it bark the theme to Seinfeld

3.X-rated programming on the Food network between Midnight and 6am

2.Three words: More Zooey Deschanel

1.I don’t know,how about a funny cartoon on FOX between 830 and 9 on Sundays? Huh,where’s that?