From the home office at tjthesportsgeek.com in beautiful downtown Orangevale,Calif.

Top Eight Signs Your Prom Date is a Loser

8. Makes you leave early because his boss needs the taco truck back

7. Your corsage is made of jalapenos and dental floss

6. Keeps calling you “Mommy”

5. Won’t shut up about his electoral college victory

4. When chaperones aren’t aware, spikes the punch with even more punch

3. The principal asks him ,”T.J., didn’t you graduate 18 years ago?”

2. Exclaims “My grandma was buried in this dress!”

1. Three words: He can’t dance!