Now that we’re done with the Things That Need to Go in 2016,now let’s delve into what needs to come back. This year’s list is a bit longer than the last couple years,so we’ve got a 15 item list this year. I hope it grows bigger as the years go on like the former list does. So here we go with the list!

15. CATCH-ALL: Commercials for malt liquor and The Budweiser Frogs

I’m not a drinker at all,but I am a fan of advertisements for adult beverages. In the 1970s you had the greatness that is Billy Dee Williams doing commercials for Colt 45 and they were fantastic. He was so smooth,hell,he still is and commercials like his for Colt 45 are missing in today’s television landscape. Shoot,if these commercials were still around,I might be a drinker again!

Also missing are the great Budweiser frogs. This campaign was so simple that it was good. I think commercials like these are due for a comeback and just might make America smile once again.

14. The phrase “Winner,winner,chicken dinner”

When did we all stop saying this?

We were saying this a lot not too long ago and it was a great phrase. Then,all of a sudden, we stopped saying it. Why did we stop saying it? It’s an awesome phrase and it works on so many levels.

This is definitely a phrase that needs to be brought back in some way. Maybe someone should name a chicken restaurant after that phrase,maybe we’d say it more,you know?

13. Little boxes of cereal in the mail

Remember when you were a kid and every once in a while the mailman would bring a sample box of cereal for you in the mail? God,I miss that.

Nowadays you can buy them in the grocery store,but I don’t want to have to buy a little box of cereal, I want to receive one in the mail for free. This is just one of those little pieces of nostalgia that I wish would be back in our lives once more and I know my brother would agree.

12. Water

We West Coasters have been in a severe drought the last couple of years and it’s undoubtedly the worst we’ve ever seen in our lifetimes. We’ve been praying for rain or some sort of solution to the drought and neither has come to fruition. As much as I hate rain day after day, I do know that we need to see a continuum of rain in our area. I keep hearing that an El Nino is coming,and just like Colin Kaepernick’s 7torm,it has yet to really come. I know that this is a big deal for people on the West Coast and that water would be a welcome sight to end this drought once and for all.

11. Streaking at graduation ceremonies

I’m sure this still happens elsewhere,but you never hear about it anymore,at least not here.

I’ll admit it,I think when people do something like this,it’s actually pretty hilarious. It’s a day full of seriousness and a day to be done with thinking and out of nowhere some goofball wearing nothing but sneakers runs out to the football field where the ceremony is taking place and shows off the goods. I think we all should be lucky to have the experience of a streaker crashing the party,or even to be that streaker.

10. School starting in September

I hate that schools in most areas start in the beginning of August now or even earlier. Up until I was in fifth grade,which was the 1992-93 school year for those of you scoring at home,school started a few days after Labor Day. Usually,we’d go to the California State Fair on Labor Day (back when it was later in the year before people started fighting on the last day) and then a few days later it was back to school for us. Then,we started going back in late August. In the time since I graduated from high school in 2000, school gets pushed back further and further. Also happening are schools not being able to turn on their air conditioning systems in time for the new school year,forcing kids to learn in hot classrooms and severe conditions.

I think if we moved school starting dates back to early September like we used to have them,it would solve a lot of problems and make life easier for these kids. Otherwise,we’re going to have a kid die from heat exaustion because of these early start dates for back to school.

9. Bob Ley’s beard
Last year during the World Cup,Bob Ley of ESPN grew one of the best beards in all of sports and television altogether. Now,it’s all but a distant memory.

I thought Ley’s beard was not only what he needed in this point in his long career at ESPN,but America loved it,too. In fact,it was one of my Best Things About 2014. I think it’s time for the Bob Ley beard to make a comeback.

8. Mike Krukow “Eliminating” people

Back in 2007,Mike Krukow began a little something where he “eliminated” people with the telestrator,a play on “circling” people which is what Hall-of-Fame pitcher and current Minnesota Twins broadcaster Bert Blyleven does. Fans everywhere around AT&T Park would hold up signs begging Kruk to eliminate them and he would oblige. Now,he hardly ever does it.
He will,on occasion,eliminate someone wearing a Dodgers hat in the stands,especially if the Dodgers aren’t even playing the Giants that night and he does it to the delight of many,myself included.

I hope Kruk reads this and if he does,I hope you bring back the eliminating,we miss it!

7. Kids playing outside

Back in the day when I was a kid, we did a lot of this. We didn’t hunker down inside the house very much to play video games,we hung out in the yard or hopped on our bikes and did stuff. We would play football or go to the elementary school and shoot hoops or do something fun. You don’t see a heck of a lot of that anymore. I know I don’t when I’m driving home from somewhere and I see the streets empty and no children anywhere outside playing.

In some ways,I understand it. We do live in different times where things aren’t as safe as when I was young and they may as well do something inside the house and be safe there,but at the same time it makes me sad to see the kind of fun myself and my friends had as children has faded away. It’d be nice to see that again.

6. Cheesy Tots

Does anyone remember when Burger King had these?

Cheesy tots were an incredible menu item and the suddenly they were gone from not only the Burger King menu,but also our hearts. They did bring them back for a little bit back in ’13, but they have yet to return since!

If the King is reading this, bring back Cheesy Tots,yo! There are a lot of people who would buy these and eat them as if there was no tomorrow! If you need a petition,I’ll start it. Whatever it takes!

5. Real NFL throwback uniforms

You’re probably saying “Wait,don’t some NFL teams have throwback uniforms?”. Yes,SOME do, but not all. Some used to be able to wear theirs,but since the NFL has limited teams to wearing only one color helmet shell for the season, you see very few teams trotting out a throwback uniform because of this lame and terrible rule. I personally like seeing teams wearing a throwback uniform, it’s a visit from history that takes you back to the time a team wore those and it looks cool and sometimes you want a team to go back to that uniform (See: Miami Dolphins on Monday Night Football this past week). I think it’s time we took a second look at changing this rule so that teams like Tampa Bay,New England,and Dallas can throwback to some totally cool uniforms.

4. Pete Rose

This is definitely a Keepin’ it Real selection because Pete Rose has served his time for betting on baseball. I was disappointed to see Rob Manfred decline Rose’s request for reinstatement and that the hope for him to be inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame be entirely dashed. This man is the all-time hits leader with 4,256. How do you keep someone who was so productive and so great at what he did from being in the Hall? Now,keep in mind,Major League Baseball has no control over who gets in because the Hall of Fame is its own entity, they can decide whether or not Rose should be eligible. I feel like a lot of those stuffy white guys who still vote on shit like this probably need to go before Rose and those like him can ever be eligible. Honestly though,he’d be the 10th worst guy in there if he ever does get in. He’s worthy of it, he’s waited 27 years. It’s time for that to take place.

3. Buffalo Wild Wings’ Maple sauce

Okay,so around the time of my birthday which is on February 16,Buffalo Wild Wings had a limited time sauce called Buttery Maple and it was absolutely fantastic. I tried some wings with that sauce at my birthday dinner and I couldn’t get enough of it. My brother and sister-in-law weren’t too keen on it,but I loved it. Then,it disappeared and made me and my friends sad that the butteryness and the mapleness was gone from our lives and our hearts. I hope that at some point that not only does it make a return,but a permanent one. Come on,Buffalo Wild Wings,as a guy who spends a lot of money at your establishment throughout the year,it’s time to give some of us this one wish.

2. NBA teams wearing white at home

When did NBA teams stop wearing white at home? It hardly even happens that much anymore. Now you have teams wearing black at home or red or green or blue and honestly,it throws me off quite a bit. I often ask at times “Why is the away team wearing their home uniforms on the road?” and have to look twice before realizing the other team is wearing what is supposed to be their road uniform. it’s so confusing.

I think it’s time we kept it simple and have the home team wear either white,gold (like the Lakers do) or silver (like the Spurs sometimes do) and have the road team wear their road colors whatever they might be,this way simple people like me have a better time knowing who’s playing who and where. I think that would help!

1. CATCH-ALL: Competency and Decency

Another Keepin’ it Real catch-all here and I think it speaks to our society greatly. I’ve found in recent times that a lot of what’s missing is both competence and decency. Competency in terms of people knowing what they’re doing not only with their jobs and their livelihoods,but also how they act, how they drive on the roads and how they think. Just look at the NFL,for example. Their officiating has gone to shit and everyone’s had about enough of it this season.

I also think we’ve stopped being decent people towards one another as well as civil and respectful. No longer do we have any tolerance for people in terms of who they are,where they come from,how they feel politically, what color their skin is, what their religion is, and the list goes on. It honestly makes me sick that the worst of people is out now and not only do I not want to be around people like that,but I abhor them and their behavior. I think if we bring these two values back to society,we’ll be much better off and will thrive as people. It’s happened before,it can happen again and it really isn’t that hard,folks!