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The Worst Commercials on Television Right Now-Volume III

It’s been a long time since we did a Worst Commercials list and it’s time one was done. The rule is that the commercial has to have been seen on television in the last three months to qualify. Here we go!


I absolutely can’t stand this commercial. First of all,there’s subtitles. Why does an American television commercial need subtitles? Also,what kind of accent does this woman pretend to have,anyway? Is it a German one? A French one? A combination of the two? In any case,it’s awful! Not the yogurt,the commercials,I’m sure the yogurt is delicious! Oh,and the dancing she does is pretty fucking awful as well! Good god!

Progressive Bachelor

Not only is The Bachelor a terrible show, but so are commercials that parody it. You know this one for Progressive where that stupid insurance box (Since when the fuck does insurance come in a goddamn box?) and these women who want to,for some reason,date a box of insurance. Well in the commercial, the fucking box totally ignores these bitches and is talking on the phone at dinner and is totally involved with himself. Then it comes time to choose someone to give his I Love Insurance button to,and he sees himself in a mirror and gives it to himself. It’s such an awful commercial. Just stick with having Flo as your spokesperson,Progressive.

Eli Manning DirecTV

Yes,I still hate Eli Manning and don’t find his DirecTV commercial entertaining at all. Yes,he is a bad comedian and a bad quarterback who I don’t find funny whatsoever. Why in the hell they got rid of Rob Lowe is beyond me, those commercials were advertising gold. Tony Romo’s commercial was better than this. Eli Manning SUCKS!

Dodge Law

Though this commercial was seen more in the spring and early summertime, it was a shitty commercial. If you were blessed with not being able to see this bad piece of advertising, it starts with a guy eating a crossaint in his new Dodge and minding his own fucking business, then this obnoxious guy from that Fast N Loud show that my dad used to watch on the weekends and some sock monkey break the law by impersonating police officers and pull him over for eating a pastry in his car, you know,something that’s his right to do in his own fucking car. Thank goodness this commercial isn’t being shown anymore, but someone please get David Hasselhoff a real job instead of being with this doofus in a Dodge commercial!

Volkswagen Old Lady Twins

This has to be the worst commercial on television right now. It’s the Volkswagen commercial with the two twins who have to be at least 105 in these ads. They’re obviously two sex starved ladies who need to seduce a car salesmen into giving them a good deal on a Volkswagen (and maybe sex in a Craftmatic adjustable bed). Plus,I can’t stand all the shouting and the hard of hearing that they have going on. Someone get them a hearing aid,please?

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September 2015
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