Hello everyone and Happy Festivus! Consider this an Airing of Grievances!

Here it is, our countdown of the Worst Things About 2020. This list includes the worst moments, things, events, and everything about this overall terrible year.

I should mention that with all the lists we’ve done this year, this should be taken semi-seriously and is being written for entertainment purposes. With that,on with the list.

20. The “Make a Cup of Coffee For Your Head” song

This song is not only horrible,but also creepy. Performed by somebody named Powfu, this song,which is officially titled “Death Bed”, rose to the top of the U.S. Hot Rock and Alternative charts this year. It is by far the most terrible song I have heard this year. The creepy voice singing about making a cup of coffee for your head drives me crazy. It sounds like something a creepy doll in a horror movie would sing and then appear out of nowhere just to kill you with a pair of hedge clippers. My coworkers know how much I hate it, it comes on way too much on the radio and I hope I never have to hear it as long as I live.

19. The Iowa Caucus

If anything signaled how much of a cluster this election was going to be (more on that later), it was the Iowa Caucus. First it was declared the Pete Buttigieg was the winner (he wasn’t,it was Bernie Sanders) and then it was inconclusive due to votes having arrived late and inconsistencies in the voting process,leading many to wonder if this process Iowa uses to decide who wins the first caucus of primary season is worth the trouble. I,for one, think it’s a bogus system and see nothing wrong with them using the primary process in lieu of the terrible way it’s being done now. It was terrible to watch and suffer through and Iowa should be ashamed of themselves.

18. Major League Baseball not getting it together

If there was any league slow to get things together during the pandemic, it’s the league that’s slow to change anything. Major League Baseball could not get it together at all until it was next to too late to have a real sort of season. The season was only 60 games long when it could’ve been longer if everyone wasn’t fighting over money and the Blue Jays had to play in Buffalo. Even the fans were replaced by cardboard cutouts. It was not the season it should’ve been. Kudos to the Marlins, Padres,and White Sox for making the playoffs for the first time in forever, but wow was that a marred season. I only hope 2021 is a much better one and one that doesn’t end with the Dodgers hoisting another trophy. Or the A’s.

17. Joe Biden and Kamala Harris being named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year

I’m gonna get a little bit of hate for this,but I don’t care and no,it isn’t because I don’t think with these two we’ll see anything significantly change. It’s because the frontline workers and first responders deserved this honor a hell of a lot more than two people who won an election (and no,it wasn’t the most important election in our lifetime, that’s gonna be the next one according to all of you!) against someone who was a horrible human being. 

Everyone who has risked their lives to help others during a pandemic that has no end in the near future should have been the Person of the Year. I think those folks are true heroes of this country, not to mention everyone who works in customer service and puts up with morons who won’t comply and wear masks (more on that later!). 

Let’s give this honor to people that deserve it, not two centrist Democrats who won’t change anything!

16. The phrase “the new normal”

One of the phrases I hated the most this year was “the new normal” and how this time in our lives was just that. I wholeheartedly disagree with every fiber of my being. None of what we’re going through is normal and us pretending it’s any sort of normal is downright foolish. 

It’s okay to recognize that this time in our lives is pure hell, in fact I think doing so is a perfectly healthy and honest thing to do. Pretending that our lives are normal during all of this is just lying to yourselves and all of us who see right through it. I hated when people said this phrase and will continue to so long as we’re in this tough time!

15. Amy Klobuchar’s only joke

The only thing worse than Amy Klobuchar as a candidate for President was her terrible mom jokes, or at least the same one she repeated over and over about how Donald Trump called her Snow Woman and she remarked how she would like to see how his hair would fare in a blizzard. She told this joke over and over and over and over and over and over until that dead horse was beaten to smithereens. 

It wasn’t that funny of a joke, you need much better material, and I am even surprised he even acknowledged you to begin with. Oh,and I am glad you aren’t President because you would’ve been awful. Not to mention you’re an abusive boss and having worked for one of those, I would not like one as the most powerful leader in the world. Please don’t throw a stapler at my face!

14. The death of George Floyd and the aftermath 

The death of George Floyd at the hands of Minneapolis police in May was definitely a dark moment for our society and it highlighted the racial injustice there is and has been in our country and that we have a long way to go in solving that. 

Floyd’s death sparked protests,rioting and looting as well as cities burning during the month of June and many waiting for substantial change to come as a result of decades of mistreatment from a group of people in a profession meant to protect and serve them. Much work has to be done to where we can get to a place where changes have been made, the debate now is how we get there and it’s been a rough conversation to have,even now, but it needs to take place.

13. CATCH-ALL: The columnist who proclaimed she would vote for Joe Biden if he “boiled babies and ate them” and the Vote Blue No Matter Who crowd

Earlier this year, a columnist by the name of Katha Pollitt published a column that began with the phrase “I would vote for Joe Biden if he boiled babies and ate them”, proclaiming that his candidacy was that important to winning back the White House. Really? That’s not a deal breaker for you? If that’s the case, you really need to evaluate what you really stand for and what will get you to not vote for someone and you’re a partisan hack tribalist who only votes for a letter next to someone’s name rather than the person who has that name.

That’s why I can’t stand the Vote Blue No Matter Who crowd because it doesn’t make sense to support someone no matter how bad they are so long as they play for your team. Wanna play that game? Okay, so if O.J. Simpson was the frontrunner for President the next election cycle as a Democrat, would you support him? If your answer is yes, you need to seek professional help as soon as possible. Just because someone has a D next to their name doesn’t mean they’re automatically good. 

12. Stephen Miller getting married on my birthday

Not that this ruined my birthday or anything since that took place before our never-ending nightmare of a pandemic, but couldn’t this racist prick have picked another day then my birthday to marry the only person who would marry his terrible ass?

Not that it really makes any difference, but the last thing I want sharing my birthday is the wedding anniversary of a racist dude like him whose hairline is receding faster than mine. It’s bad enough that I had to share one with Kim Jong Il’s crazy ass, now it’s Stephen Miller’s wedding anniversary. I just cannot win,Can I?

11. CATCH-ALL: Social distancing and virtual everything

I have not been a fan of social distancing and doing everything virtually. I understand why we have to do it,but just because I do doesn’t mean I hate having to do it. Being away from friends and family and having to keep my distance from people has made me very sad and even pretty lonely. There are friends and family I have yet to see at all this year because of all that we’ve had to go through.

It’s also the same with doing everything virtually. From talking to family and friends to even visits with the doctor, we don’t get to see each other in person anymore and while the interaction is nice, in terms of having any sort of companionship and closeness to anyone, it doesn’t fill that void whatsoever. I can’t wait for this to be something I don’t have to do all of the time and for real life interactions with people,including doctors.

10. Taco Bell getting rid of the 7-Layer Burrito and Mexican Pizza

If there was a worse time for Taco Bell to eliminate menu items, this was it. Sure,they’ve done it before,but they also did it at a time when people need anything they can find to make them happy. The elimination of popular items like the 7-Layer Burrito and the Mexican Pizza, both items that had been staples on the menu for decades did not make anyone happy. Some people have vowed not to return to the popular fast food chain until those items return.

I myself was a fan of both items and was perturbed about their disappearance from the menu. I can only hope that one day they make a triumphant comeback, but for now it seems like they are gone for good.

9. The mental health crisis that keeps getting ignored

Aside from the pandemic that all of us are suffering through, we also have a mental health crisis that predates the current suffering and only adds to it. Beyond the current economic troubles with people being unemployed, not being able to work due to being shut down,and having to figure out where their next meal is coming from, they’re also tired,fatigued, lonely,and sad. 

This is and has been a tough time for anyone who is hurting with mental health issues, myself included. I will disclose that this is the loneliest I have ever been in nearly 39 years of life and no other time comes close. I wish for this time to be over more than anyone. But more than that, I want these issues to be addressed by our elected officials because next to none of them have desired to touch this subject and nobody has offered solutions. This pandemic was not anyone’s fault and the folks suffering through this with the worst of mental health problems need whatever help they can get. I know I am getting the best I can get, but not everyone is as lucky as me. I’m writing about this for them because they matter a lot,too. It’s time their issues were taken care of,too. Nobody deserves to live in a constant state of anxiety.

8. The political conventions

We covered this in the Things That Need to Go list,but it’s worth mentioning again because these conventions were utter trash. The Republican Convention was bad because all it was in terms of substance was them saying how bad and socialist Joe Biden is (he isn’t) and how great Trump is (he isn’t). They didn’t mention anything in terms of how they’re going to make the country any better or laid out plans for the future. Even worse was the Democratic Convention where they cow-towed to centrists and Republicans and basically ignored progressives and anything they stand for in their own platform. They honestly had a chance to try and win me over with their vote and they chose not to and as a result my vote went elsewhere (Don’t ask me who I voted for,that’s none of your goddamn business!).

These conventions proved to me that they’re a total waste of time and money and there’s no reason to have them anymore because we already know who’s gonna win already. Leave these events back in the 1950s where they belong!

7. CATCH-ALL: Karens and everyone who threw a temper tantrum over wearing a mask

One thing that was bothersome was all the people who couldn’t help but cry over having to wear a mask during a pandemic that’s killing thousands of people. One group in particular that was embarrassing were all the “Karens” who threw fits about not just wearing masks, but anything and everything possible about “muh freedom”. Give me a break!

My health and everyone else’s overrides your freedom. It’s funny to me how much these folks they’ll do anything for their country, but when it comes to wearing a mask to help keep people safe, it’s a violation of their rights. I bet you anything that these are the same folks who don’t wear seat belts, have surgery in someone’s garage (since they don’t believe in science) and think shoes are restrictive. This isn’t a forever thing and all that think otherwise should stop going to cult meetings. What else do you want me to say?

6. Everything being closed

With the pandemic raging as long as it has, so much closed in our lives this year. From movie theaters to restaurants to the Happiest Place on Earth, so many things we enjoy were closed this year. Some places have reopened,then closed again,then reopened again,and have closed yet again. 

It’s not only depressing that these places have closed, it’s also a bit maddening because of how long this crisis has dragged on and honestly should be over by now. There are some places we enjoy that may never reopen again such as some movie theaters and that makes me sad because going to the movies is something I have been doing more of the past few years and I would love to do that again once this is all over. I can’t wait for all of this to be over so we can go out and enjoy the places we all loved before and will again.

5. 2020 overall

One of my friends suggested having the whole year overall be on the list,and I agreed because this year as a whole was just bad.

I myself had a rough start to the year with being sick on Super Bowl Sunday and then having an ear infection for three weeks after my 38th birthday. Just as I recovered from it, life as we know it was altered for the foreseeable future. As the year went on the worse it got and there was no saving it at all.

All I know is that we are all awaiting 2021 with hope and better days ahead!

4. CATCH-ALL: The 2020 election and everyone who was a sore loser over the end results

This election was nothing special at all. It,like all the others ones, was yet again another lesser of two evils election and anyone who thinks otherwise is a partisan hack who votes for anything with their favorite letter next to it. Yes,I’m relieved that Donald Trump will be out of office, but no,I’m not excited about who’s coming in because nothing is going to fundamentally change for the better. Nonetheless,Biden won and will take office on Jan. 20.

By the way,that’s something many people still have to accept and that’s pretty sad. I understand being a little upset that it didn’t turn out the way you hoped,but not accepting that Trump lost and thinking it’s not over a month and a half after it is and has been decided is straight up delusional and you should probably get over it. Most of those people are in his cult anyhow and will do anything he tells them to. If he told them to barbecue a pair of flip flops and eat them because it kills the chances of getting coronavirus they would probably do it. It’s time to take down the flags from your oversized truck and sulk in defeat. Otherwise, you’re looking more and more like a fool keeping them on there. You lost,get over it!

3. The loss of celebrity icons

We lost a great deal of celebrity icons this year and the list is endless. From Kobe Bryant to Kenny Rogers to Jerry Stiller to Fred Willard to Neil Peart to James Lipton to Regis Philbin to Chadwick Boseman to Wilford Brimley to Grant Imahara to Kelly Preston to Eddie Van Halen to Little Richard to Ruth Bader Ginsburg to Sean Connery to Alex Trebek, a lot of famous people we truly treasured left us in 2020. 

I know that not everyone mourns when a celebrity passes on, but there were a lot of them this year I really enjoyed, many of them are listed above and I think the world got a lot less joyous from them having left us. May they all rest in peace!

2. Your Congress not at work

If there was something I would put at second place on this list,it’s the people who are supposed to represent you in Congress, but truly don’t unless you’re ultra rich or are a corporation that can have their bidding done by them. 

Whether it’s Nancy Pelosi or Mitch McConnell or Lindsay Graham or Chuck Schumer, these are people who are in a big club that caters to their kind and only their kind. How do I know this? Because during a pandemic where millions have contracted the virus and have lost their jobs and their healthcare and are having trouble even feeding themselves, they have trouble for months getting relief in terms of extra money out to people who are suffering. You have tone deaf people like Pelosi parading around her expensive ice cream stored in an expensive freezer on late night television as millions are unemployed and hungry. You have McConnell, who is as equal a serial ghoul as Pelosi, who is hell bent on not doing anything to help anyone through a tough time because he’s a dickhead. 

Not only that, but it seems like the right things to do during a time like this are the things they least want to do. If you’re wondering why Congress overall has an approval rating of 13-percent, this is why, it’s because they do not care about the people they’re supposed to represent. If they did, they would do so much more for them and instead, they cater to whoever is the wealthiest and those who aren’t get crumbs. Stop voting for these rich pricks once and for all,Democrats and Republicans alike. Get them out!

1. COVID-19

If you’ve been following along to the list, you pretty much know that this is the worst thing that happened this year,and it’s not even close. It’s ruined everyone’s lives and continues raging on and seems like it will never go away.

From having to wear masks all the time to not having an open Disneyland Resort, this virus has altered life as we know it right now. It’s taken us away from our friends, our families,and for some of us our jobs away. 

While I hate this time that we’re in because of this god awful virus, I do want everyone to know that we’re going to get through this tough time and call me crazy,but I think we’ll get through it sooner than we think it will. I just have a hunch that things will get better and it’s because we as a society, as a world have no choice but to make that happen. We all have a role to play in making that possible and I am requesting to everyone that we make every effort to get our world to return to normal in any way that you can. Don’t let me down!